First, tomorrow is Mother's Day. While I know it is important to honor the day and remember how much I love being Peanut's Momma, the task of facing the day itself feels next to impossible. Every ad, flyer, commercial simply serves as a painful reminder that I'm a Momma without a Peanut to hug tomorrow morning.
We were revisiting a whole series of Peanut pictures this afternoon with Grandma and Grandpa, thanks to an amazing Mother's Day gift Dadda created - along with the fantastic Heidi Drexler - in the form of a large canvas photo collage. The collage includes photos from all 16.5 months of your beautiful existence, and every photo has a happy, funny memory.
There is a hilarious, cheesy grin picture that I used on our New Year's cards. I reminded Grandma I took the picture the afternoon of December 10, the same day we visited Santa Claus. A few hours later she called me to share a memory from that same day. A memory I had totally forgotten. It was the first time you really, REALLY walked. You walked the entire length of Grandma and Grandpa's family room, and you were sooooo full of pride and Peanut spitfire you started bee-bopping around their entire house. I had you home with me alone that weekend while Dadda was out of town, and got to watch you walk everywhere for the next two days until BAM! walking was no longer "fun." I was disappointed Dadda missed those first few days of walking, but knew we just needed to be patient and supportive. You'd get the Walking Groove back.
You also were just as stubborn as your Momma. I think you knew exactly how much we wanted you to walk and, well, you were just going to do it on your own timeline. When we weren't looking, you would take off walking. But the second you saw us watching you, down you went! And your crawl...hilarious. Hands slapping the floor, super fast, laughing the whole distance. This went on for about two more weeks, until over the holidays it all clicked and you were officially Peanut The Walker.
I wish we had more photos of you walking. In their absence, I can only continue to share the memories. And, they are all wonderful. I love you with all my heart, Peanut. To the moon and back.