Saturday, May 21, 2011

McDonald's?!? For me????

Peanut -

Dadda and I were out running a bunch of errands early this morning, and decided to stop at McDonald's for breakfast.  We sat by the children's area, and got to watch small bunches of kids chase each other between bites of their breakfasts.  It made me ask the question, "Can you imagine how different things would be if we had Peanut here?"  We both got quiet and sad for a moment, but were lifted by memories of the first time we took you to McDonald's.

It was right before your 1st birthday, as we were driving down to Big Cedar Lodge for a family vacation.  We were just about to fully transition you to table food and milk, and decided it was time for you to try a cheeseburger.  Oh....holy cannoli!  Actually, holy cheeseburger!  You took your first bite, and gave us that questioning look that asked, "Is this for ME?!?  Seriously?"  And once we offered you another bite, you were overjoyed.  So happy, in fact, that I had to snap a few pictures with my Blackberry.

At the end of that lunch, I took a few more photos of you and Dadda with a decidedly creepy-looking Ronald statue.  Judging by your face in the pics, I think you found him just as scary as Momma!  What I love about these pictures and this memory is how happy and perfect this moment in time was for our family.  That was a great vacation, and right on the heels of it we celebrated your 1st birthday.  What an innocent, blissful time in our world.

All day today I've been visited by brightly colored butterflies - in particular around the Connor Tree we planted in the side yard.  It's just beginning to bloom, and has attracted all kinds of birds, butterflies and lightning bugs.  I think they sense that this is a Very Special Tree, and want some of its magic.  I share the sentiment.  But, I also think you send these butterflies my way to comfort and remind me of our love, and the rebirth of hope.

Peanut, I miss you so very much.  I wish I could feel your hugs again.  Instead, I must be comforted by sending you all my love straight to heaven...and to the moon and back.

- Momma

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