Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Damn You, Celine Dion. Damn You!!!

Peanut -

First things first.  Momma does not like Celine Dion.  Not even a little bit.  Nothing against Celine or the millions of people who must adore her since she sold out her show in Las Vegas for how many years???   But, her brand of music tends to be a little melodramatic for Momma's taste.  Yet, somehow Ms. Dion has appeared in my iTunes library, and is now on the iPod I keep hooked up in my car.  Curious...

So, on the drive home tonight, I had the always dangerous iPod shuffle rotation in full swing.  Peanut, I think you sneak into the car and turn on songs that will speak to Momma in ways she never, ever imagined.  Like tonight.  I'm cruising along, minding my own business, when that Celine Dion song from "Titanic" starts playing.  You know the one - "My Heart Will Go On."  It's billed as the romantic love theme from the movie, but I realized tonight it truly is a love letter to the most precious person in your life in the midst of heartbreak.

Anyway, here's what happened as I'm DRIVING.  The song starts playing with those telltale flute-like instruments.  For some reason I don't forward to the next song.  The lyrics kick in -

Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on

Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show you go on

At this point, I realize I'm crying.  Just a little cry.  Not too bad.  I throw on my sunglasses to prevent strange looks from other drivers.  

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

Little cry is turning into a big cry.  Hmmm...is it still safe to be driving along at 50 mph?  Sure...

Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're gone

Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold to
In my life we'll always go on

Commence the sobbing.  Dammit.  I'm in the center lane.  Time to start thinking about getting pulled off the road.  Other drivers, please do NOT be alarmed!

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

CUE THE DRAMATIC KEY CHANGE!  This gets me every time, whether it's in a commercial, a happy song, a love song.  Doesn't matter.  Sobbing turns into hysterical, heaving crying.  At least I'm finally pulled off the road in a random strip mall parking lot.  Classy, Momma.

You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

Oh, thank god.  The song's over.  The little flutey things are winding down.  Hmmmm...let's play it again!

Of course, I listened to it three more times.  In the midst of the final replay, I looked to my right and saw an amazing sunset behind a bank of clouds.  Four giant rays of sun were poking out in each direction, and I felt your warm smile.  Then, I got home tonight to find 4 - FOUR - froggies hanging out on our kitchen window.  Bonus Peanut visits.  So, with that my darling boy, I send you giant kisses and tell you I love you to the moon and back...on and on and on!

- Momma


  1. Your Amazing Angel Momma and I'm glad you got a froggie visit tonight...

  2. Well - As a HUGE fan of Celine (I saw her in Vegas) I wasn't sure where you were going with this post - but I loved that the music moved you. With all my kids I don't get to listen to my music much, but when I do I find it SO theraputic. I hope it helps you heal a little more - Best thoughts- Hugs too!