It was 95 degrees in St. Louis yesterday. And 65 degrees today. Holy temperature change! The cooler temperatures were ushered in by some extremely powerful thunderstorms last night. They came marching into the region around 1:30 am, and gained full strength by 3:00 am. Needless to say, Momma didn't sleep much - or well - last night.
In the midst of the window-rattling thunder and constant lightning I had a half-asleep dream of you. Or, maybe it was more of a vision. I imagined what the night would be like if you were still alive. How you would have made your way into our bedroom, and wiggled your way into the giant, king-size bed. How you would have pretended to be brave, unafraid of the terrifying thunder, while snuggling up with Momma for protection. To calm and reassure you I would rub my thumb in slow circles from your forehead to the bridge of your nose...that always soothed you and made you smile. Eventually, you would fall asleep while I watched your sweet little face, and listened to the sweet sounds of you sleeping. It's the little, everyday moments like these that I so desperately crave, and miss.
Peanut, you are so loved. You are so missed. To the moon and back.