Last night Dadda gave me the most wonderful, special gift. A necklace. A Momma necklace with two silver hand-stamped discs and a large mother-of-pearl disc. The messages Dadda chose for the two stamped discs are so meaningful, so thoughtful, so perfect. I'm not sure I'll ever take the necklace off. Ever.
You see, Peanut, this necklace is the first item that represents our little family. It names you, your baby brother, Dadda and Momma. But, more than that, it symbolizes the fact that we will be together for eternity. That this time on earth, this time when we are physically separated, is just temporary.
The inscription on the larger disc is the title of tonight's posting: Someday we will all fly together. Dadda wrote that message while talking to The Bean one night about his big brother. He explained that in heaven we will all fly together, a family of butterflies. I love that thought, that image. And, I believe it.
Peanut, this necklace is so much more than just something I will wear around my neck. It speaks for my heart, and our future. In just one short day it has brought me thousands of tears - tears of joy, remembrance, loss, hope.
As I cradled your little brother in my arms this afternoon, I discovered he was fast asleep on my chest, fiercely gripping the necklace in his little fist. In that moment, the broken circle of our little family came together in flawed perfection.
Missing your smiles, your funny little grunts, your electric blue eyes, your expressive little hands, your amazing blonde hair, your furrowed brows, and everything else that is so perfectly Peanut. With Momma love, to the moon and back!