Monday, July 16, 2012

Farewell...Not Goodbye

Peanut -

There is one more angel in heaven...this time she's a Momma Angel.  Sarah.  Sweet Sarah, who always strove to bring a smile to others, who put herself last, who loved her children more than anything else in this world.  Her daughter and sons are still here on earth struggling to make sense of life without their mom, so I have to believe heaven needed more mommas.  Hopefully you have already found her.  Hopefully you have given her a giant Peanut-style hug, a booming belly laugh, and maybe even a verse of two of "Itsy Bitsy Spider."

Many of us bid Sarah "farewell" this evening.  Momma has learned to not say "goodbye" when a loved one leaves this world...simply "farewell."  Because, I know we will see each other again.

Momma can't stop thinking about the thank you card we sent out to the hundreds of family members and friends who supported and surrounded us in the weeks after you passed away.  It was simply too much to think about writing a note to over 400 people.  So Momma borrowed a tool from one of the first grief support books (first of many) she read in those early months.  We wrote one heartfelt message and had it printed in a very special photo card.  Tonight Momma is sharing that note with the just feels like the right time:

Dear Friends and Family,

We so appreciate every card, plant, hug, call, and every other gesture of love and sympathy extended during our tragic loss of Connor.  While our hearts are torn to pieces and our family is now incomplete, having the care of friends and relatives has been more support than we can possibly convey.

It is currently too painful to write each person individually, but please know we have read, re-read, cried and taken comfort from every expression of love and support.

Friends like you are the blessing that is sent to help pull us through this time of grief and sorrow.  Thank you for all you have done to help us say, "Farewell for now, we will see you again soon" to our lovely little Peanut.

In Peanut's loving memory,
Shaun and Lynn

Peanut, we also inscribed on the other side of the card the following very personal note to you:

We love you right up to the moon - and back.  For eternity.
Connor Patrick "Peanut" Mulholland
9/12/2009 - 1/26/2011
Love and kisses,
Momma and Dadda

I share these words in the hopes that someone else can find support, help, love, hope in the thoughts we expressed in those most painful, horrific days.  I share them tonight in my own Momma tribute to Sarah.  Sweet Sarah.  Momma Angel Sarah.  You left us far, far too soon.

Peanut, give her a hug.  Read her your favorite book.  And remember - always remember - I love you.  Right up to the moon...and back!

- Momma

Photo collage similar to the cover of Peanuts' photo card.

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